Monday, May 21, 2012

Intuition Doesn't Lie

It's amazing the connections you make throughout your lifetime. When you meet someone, how you meet them, and why you meet them. I am a believer of the cliche "everything happens for a reason", thus meeting people happens for a reason. Same thing applies to life events. When something happens, how it happens, and why it happens. Although the latter of three we usually realize with time. Then there is a person's intuition. Not many people hone in on their "6th sense", but as I experience life more, I have learned to listen to that voice. Nothing feels so "right" until you have that self-affirming moment. I'm not sure if I'm making much sense, or if I am making perfect sense to you. Now, I'm sure you're wondering if I believe getting this "c" happened for a reason. Yes, I do. Why? It is still to early in the event to answer that question, but it will come with time. How? My intuition strongly sides with one thing, but there is still not enough evidence to affirm at this point. My point is, I am not letting this define who I am, but rather than accept it and deal with it. During this entire journey, I have learned to listen and follow my instincts, because in the end it is my body...and I know my body the best. Stay tuned at a later date for the second part to this "food for thought".

I don't know if it's because I haven't been to work since May 9th, therefor have a lot of time on my hands during the day....or, if I am finally taking much needed time for self discovery....or, if it's the side effects of the different medications and hormones I've had....or a combination of all of the above. I've had a couple good "emotional" moments with reality, particularly when I started back up with my workout routine. I decided on Friday I was well enough (and the effects of 2 rounds of anesthesia finally wore off) to do a WOD ("work out of the day" for you non-crossfitters). Although, I am still limited in upper body activity until the doc clears me, I am perfectly able to perform alternate exercises. I had to scale/modify the WOD to meet my limitations, which was a little annoying being the competitive person I am. I kept hearing words of encouragement and praise from a fellow classmate and the coach during the WOD. In that very moment, reality hit and I was overcome with a unraveling mix of emotions I cannot put into words. It is a very humbling experience for a person to have so many "cheerleaders" near and far. To actually hear these "cheerleaders" while you're trying to push your body to it's limit without compromising it's healing, it's very empowering. This "c' may be trying to take over part of my body, but I am not letting it take over my life. The fact I am part of an elite class of badass women is more empowering.

I leave you with photos of 2 of my incisions a week post-surgery. One of them is a little more "pink" than the other. It is a little more sensitive and irritated mainly because of where my bra hits on my left side. As for the sentinel node biopsy, the cancer has NOT spread to the lymph nodes. So I am still CLEAR of chemotherapy!!

Then, courtesy of pinterest, I found some little words of inspiration rightfully fitted for today's blog. Enjoy! =)

Left arm.

Right arm.

Read them again and let it absorb in that knogg'n of yours. =)


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